A New Season of Mad Men Means a New Mad Men Yourself You!
July 7, 2010

So in case you’ve been under some sad, sad rock where the gentle glow of quality television program does not shine, Mad Men‘s fourth season fast approaches, by which I mean why the f*ck isn’t it July 25th already?  Seriously.

Anyways, should your sad, sad rock happened to be buried under a boulder where the interwebs dare not tread, you might not have heard about how AMC has a Mad Men avatar generator over at MadMenYourself.com as part of their online marketing campaign.  Well, they do, and it’s brilliant, and now Mad Men Yourself has been updated in anticipation of the fourth season, so you know what that means: it’s time to Mad Men Yourself all over again!  Everybody’s doing it, and by everybody, I mean me:

mad men avatar generator season 4

See, last season’s Mad Men Yourself me was all about sartorial simplicity (cardigans and ties) and shameless alcoholism (martinis…EVERYWHERE), but a new season of Mad Men demands a new Mad Men me (and you!), so I decided The Look for season 4 is all about “business pizazz!” (plaid jackets and briefcases) and “slightly more conspicuous alcoholic” (oh, Bloody Mary, the drink that’s never too early to drink and can always just be “tomato juice, but fancy” to your coworkers).  My Look also says “Someone’s taken their love of Joan Holloway’s accordion playing one step too far,” but this isn’t a rip-off of a tagline for post-modern slasher, so let’s go see what sort of zany moments from Season Three your Mad Men Yourself you can get yourself into:

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Today’s Secret Shame: Megan Fox’s Fake PSA Has Made My Morning
August 13, 2009

ASUUU MADREEE!!!  There are mornings when I simply adore the MTA and all that public transit has to offer.  Then, of course, there are the days in which a train ahead of you stalls, and you find yourself pondering the injustice of another fare hike while your train idles on the track.  Sadly, today was much more like the latter than the former, so you’d better believe that I totally had my bitchface on when I got off the subway.  Gene Tierney bitchface, to be precise:

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Fortunately enough, a new bit of viral marketing for Jennifer’s Body has cropped up all over the interwebs, and it simply reconfirms my suspicions that this movie is going to be trashy goodness.  The clip’s a PSA in which Megan Fox discusses the trials and tribulations of being a teenager.  She may not be the obvious (or even reasonable) choice for such a message, but NO MATTER!  When Megan Fox wants to talk about peer pressure and teen bullying, you’d better shut up and listen:

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Mad Men Viral Marketing Creates Avatar Generator/Head Exploder
July 27, 2009

The Mad Men cartoons by Nobody’s Sweetheart‘s Dyna Moe are inspired stuff by any account, but they’re Mad Men crack if you’re a fan of the show.  Given that I could stare at it all day, “Joan and the Xerox” is my desktop wallpaper at work, which means I get to stare at it all day.  Mmm….Joan.

Anyways, the geniuses behind Mad Men‘s marketing have properly outdone themselves (I bet they work for Sterling Cooper), and created the greatest time waster I could have ever wished for: The Mad Men Avatar Generator, MadMenYourself.com.  And yes, that faint popping noise you just heard was the sound of my head bursting like a ripe cantaloupe on account of a severe enthusiasm overdose.  

Seriously, though, I can now live the live I’ve always wanted, aka, in Mad Men, and I get to be a fabulously kitschy Dyna Moe cartoon to be fabulous icing on my dream-life cake!  For example, look at how happy Don Draper is to see me when I arrive for another day at Sterling Cooper:

madmen yourself sterling cooper

Me: Why hello, Don.  You’re looking fetching in your suit.  As usual.

Cartoon Don Draper: Why thank you.  It may not be work appropriate over here at Sterling Cooper, but you look quite dapper in that cardigan.  And I should know, because my last name’s Draper.  Get it?  It’s a pun.  Ha.  Would you like to go for drinks during lunch?

Me: SQUEEEEEEE!!!

Cartoon Don Draper: What’s that?

Me: Yes.

Later, over cocktails: 

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This Viral Marketing Campaign Seals the Deal: I Absolutely Must See Obsessed on Opening Night
April 2, 2009

It’s no secret that I can’t wait to see Obsessed.  I’ve long enjoyed watching Ali Larter since her days in The House on Haunted Hill and Final Destination, and I’m quite serious that I believe this movie will make her a camp icon for a generation of the gays.  She’s like the Gina Gershon to Beyonce’s Elizabeth Berkley.  Now theres a new viral marketing campaign for the movie, Get Obsessed With Ali, and it’s totally set my camp sensors off.

All you do is upload a photo, answer a few simple questions from a list of preselected answers, and then the site generates a personal message from Ali’s totally crazy stalker character, Lisa.  It’s so simple, I can even do it:

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Ruh-roh!  Looks like Ali Larter’s my batshit insane stalkerriffic fag hag!  I hate it when that happens (I’m totally lying when I say that).

Beyond simply being a total pleasure to watch Ali’s eyes burn like a the flaming pyre of a warehouse of Levi’s bootcut crazy jeans burning to the ground, the ending is an absolute LOL-bomb, y’all.  Make sure you’ve just peed before you you make your own Get Obsessed With Ali video; you might otherwise wet yourself.

If this site is any indication, then Obsessed is well aware of the trashopalooza that it is.  April 24th will clearly be the campiest day of this month, and I’m painfully giddy in anticipation.  You should be too.

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