Looks Like David Hayter Will Not Be Invited to Take Back the Night
March 11, 2009

david-hayter-gross

As Videogum noted, one of Watchmen‘s scribes, David Hayter, has posted an open letter on the internet imploring fans to see the movie again this weekend to keep box office up and therefore make studio heads feel confident in green lighting future Watchmen-esque projects.  Much of Hayter’s argument requires him to indulge in a little self-congratulatory ego masturbation, because that’s how you make a convincing argument.  For example:

I’ve seen it twice now, and despite having run the movie in my head thousands of times, my two viewings still don’t’ allow me to view the film with the proper distance or objectivity. Is it Apocalypse Now? Is it Blade Runner? Is it Kubrick, or Starship Troopers? I don’t know yet.

I’m gonna go for d) none of the above.  And also, Mr. Hayter: Kubrick is a filmmaker, so he probably shouldn’t be in a list that consists of movie titles.  But maybe that’s a stylistic choice irksome only to me, so I won’t dwell.

I certainly agree with his sentiment that, particularly when it comes to the film industry, you cast a vote every time you purchase a ticket.  It’s rather tacky that he has to be the one to make this plea for audiences to see Watchmen again; the movie’s as much his (ridicu)baby as it is Snyder’s, so Hayter’s essentially one of those parents with those awful bumper stickers on their vans about how their child’s on honor roll or Mensa.  Except whenever he has you come over and babysit, he makes you pay him.  He’s wrapped the ugliest sales-pitch sweater in a box with lovely pity-party ribbons and glossy sophisticated-taste paper as if that makes what he’s giving you any better.  Thanks, but no thanks.

But when Hayter gets to his climax, in which he uses a particular scene from Watchmen to articulate how the movie’s supposed to be dark and challenging yet ultimately rewarding as entertainment, he completely shits his (crazy) pants:

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The Bestest: I’m Here to Recruit You to Buy “Milk” on DVD
February 7, 2009

I literally just read this and spilled my milk (WHOOOOOOOOOOOOAH!  Puns are the best) after I read this.

But seriously, though, why aren’t you already excited about the impending release of Milk on DVD?  ‘Cos need I remind you?  I shouldn’t, but here goes:

Excellent.  You’ve been reminded, so let us continue.

Milk stands as a precedent for American cinema.  Brokeback Mountain was great, but that movie was also bogged down in the politics of homo-self-loathing.  Milk escapes that space and craves for something different.  What if we respected ourselves as mere human beings that deserve basic, inalienable rights?  What if we spoke out and verbalized a longing for such a respect from the rest of this nation, or any nation, that refuses such a simple, human recognition?  Milk, as a movie, doesn’t exist in closets, nor does it even bother to come out of them.  It explodes them.  For once, cinematically, we begin to get answers to the questions that really matter.

But let’s get serious (if we weren’t enough already).

In a time where the images of homosexuals in mainstream media are constructed by flaming queens and closet cases, Milk stands as a socio-political testament to the notion that we are just as much like you as anyone else.  No other film this year has been so pointedly political yet so simultaneously cinematically beautiful.  If nothing else, it merges documentary material and original footage as though we were seeing a news broadcast in such a seamless fashion that the walls between documentary and fiction crumble in such a way that you practically forget this isn’t a documentary.  Brilliant.  And then there’s that Danny Elfman score.  Perfection.

I understand that we live in a time where every dollar means so much more (both politically and in our pockets, if nothing else), and that is why I say: buy Milk.  Or rent it at the very least.  You won’t regret it.  Sean Penn is the best.  Seriously, give him the Oscar. NOW.

And as for that film?  Well, it gives us hope.  And hope itself is something to matter in these times.

Thankee, DVDactive.

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