Happy 70th Birthday With a “B”, Liza With a “Z”!
March 12, 2016

liza minnelli 70th birthday cake rent a cop

You’re a consummate entertainer, an unwavering source of joy on this blog, and a true Hollywood legend. It’s only fitting your celebration be bigger than your hair in Rent-a-Cop (the biggest), and better than wearing teal leather gloves (the best) or bossing around Burt Reynolds (also the best). Happy 70th birthday, Liza!!!

[Original Rent-a-Cop still via Kino.de]

Advertisements

This Rosie O’Donnell Show Interview with Liza Minnelli Is Something Else
February 22, 2016

liza minnelli rosie odonnell show

It’s my belief that all things are made better by Liza Minnelli, and so today I propose a little MWM: Monday With Minnelli. In particular, I’d like to suggest this interview with an “I” between Ms. Minnelli and the inspiration for Cabaret 2‘s favorite person, Rosie O’Donnell. It’s something else from top (O’Donnell) to bottom (David Gest), so give it a watch and let’s discuss:

(more…)

In Honor of Her 69th Birthday: Liza Minnelli Is Cooler Than You
March 12, 2015

liza minnelli oscars birthday cake

Since today is Liza Minnelli’s birthday, what better way to celebrate the Hollywood royalty, living legend, national treasure, and personal blogdrag inspiration that is La Liza than for Justin Sayre of the Meeting of the International Order of the Sodomites to remind you that Liza Minnelli is cooler than you: (more…)

Whatever You Do Tonight, Oscars, Let’s Not Leave Out Ms. Minnelli
February 22, 2015

Liza-Minelli-OSCARS-2014

NEVER FORGET.

[Image via Fashion Addicted Foodies]

Is This the Most Perfect YouTube Video Title?
February 4, 2015

liza minnelli mein herr chair

Your mileage may very, but I’m going to go with a resounding “YES!” After all, it’s got Liza Minelli and internal rhyme. What more can you ask for?

And because every day’s better with a little Cabaret, let’s all relive the joys of “Mein Herr with Chair” after the jump:

(more…)

Sh*t Liza Minnelli Says!!!
January 11, 2012

ALERT THE AMPHIBIOUS SQUADRON QUEENS! At last, an iteration of this wildly exhausted “Shit Somebody or Another Says” meme for the rest of us, aka, those who can appreciate a rather uncanny Liza Minnelli impersonation, aka, not this one! Why, it’s so good  it gave me the dizzies! Now who wants some Moo Shu?

Much love to Best Week Ever by way of Vulture for this one.

Terry Richardson Gives Us Liza With an “OMFG”
August 4, 2011

Terry Richardson shot the above image of Liza Minnelli for Love Magazine, and you all know I love me my Liza, so basically what I’m saying right now is, “I’ll take all the copies of Love Magazine, please!” Seriously, she may be sans sequins (“Say it ain’t so!”–This guy.), but Liza’s dropping some serious I-don’t-give-a-f*ck FACE while wearing a coat that looks like it’s made from her hair. I’m sorry, but you’ll have to excuse me ’til my eyeballs stop bleeding from all this GLAMOUR.

Anyways, in case that wasn’t enough for you (and really, how could it ever be? Liza glamour back and forth FOREVAH!), here’s another picture of Liza bringing so much piping hot hotness that I have to type this with oven mitts:

(more…)

A Very Happy 65th Birthday with a “B” to Our Beloved Liza with a “Z”!
March 12, 2011

It’s safe to say that over at this corner of the internet, my love for Liza Minnelli’s been rather well documented. For examples: Here and here. And also here. OH, and definitely here.

Anywho, given how Liza love abounds around here, you’d think I’d probably just throw up a picture of Liza in all her sequined glory, post a clip of her killing it on stage at the Palace (or anywhere else, when you think about it, because that’s what Liza Minelli does, y’all: She KILLS IT), she-screech a little about how much I think she’s one of our greatest living legends and national treasures, and then just call it a day. I mean, I could, and after all, it sorta wouldn’t be the first time. MAIS NON!

Liza turns 65 this year, and that’s a damn special year as far as I’m concerned! I’ll be happy if I can get about at all without the assistance of a Rascal Scooter when I’m 65, so strutting about the way Liza still does would be asking for a lot. As such, this year we’re doing things a bit different, y’all.

Above? We have a fabulous caricature by one of my favorite artists, Al Hirschfeld, from the galleries over at Flixster. And below? A stunning discovery I just made in the name of Liza Minnelli birthday post research. So ladies and gentlemen, it’s with greatest pleasure to present the hot piece of early-90s razzle-dazzle that is Liza Minnelli performing “Losing My Mind” on The Arsenio Hall Show:

(more…)

Blog Post #529, in Which There’s the Obligatory Liza Minnelli Drag Queen Photo Shoot from Halloween
November 8, 2010

For me, every Halloween’s outcome is a crap shoot.  Some years I’ll really get into the spirit and go out all dressed (or dragged) up, and other years will be spent holed up in my bedroom with whatever horror movies I can get my hand on and a bag of candy, all hopped-up on sugar and shouting obscenities at the television.  Fortunately enough, this year I ended up going with the former after I was invited to a Halloween party by my dear friend Lindsay.  Of course she and I would have to go as a pair, but obviously not as a lazy metaphor for sexual penetration:

Mostly because that lock costume would make me self-conscious about my hips, but whatever, I digress.

Our plan was to go as Lucille and Lucille II from Arrested Development; however, that fell through when we found that every last old-lady-with-a-bob wig was snatched up like it was a Brazilian drag competition.  All the same, I knew I still had to go as Liza Minnelli because:

  1. If Sandra Lee can do it semi-homemade, so could I.
  2. I’d already committed to the look by shaving my beard and dying my hair.
  3. Duh.
  4. Double-duh.

ANYWAYS, I’m not usually one to put overtly personal material up here (this isn’t LiveJournal, ladies!), but I did Liza drag this weekend, damnit, and if this tranny train wreck isn’t at least slightly camp, I’m clearly in need of six weeks intensive camp therapy (Joan Crawford movie marathons and Showgirls dance lessons).  If nothing else, this’ll be good for a laugh.  Or extremely vivid nightmares about a tackily dressed middle-aged lesbian.  Either/or, I would like to present without any further ado:

(more…)

Hooray for the New First Lady of New York, Ms. Sandra Lee!
November 3, 2010

You know, I should probably be more bothered over last night’s elections, but I’m curiously at ease with all of this.  Sure, I find the news that Iowa apparently lost its damn mind and voted out three of their state’s supreme court judges on account of last year’s ruling to make Iowa one badass bitch of a state to be both terribly disheartening and equally worrisome, but I’m also young and optimistic, so I know I still have plenty of time to meet and marry my dream Canadian boyfriend.  Or any Canadian, for that matter (HEYYY LADIEEES).  What can I say?  Desperate times (Sarah Palin for President) call for desperate measures (sham marriages).  Just sayin’.

Of course, it’s also worth noting I’m currently taking great comfort in Andrew Cuomo trouncing Carl Paladino and being elected Governor of New York.  Carl Paladino is The Worst, and not only is Andrew Cuomo is not The Worst, you know what else?  He’s dating Food Network persona Sandra Lee.  Sanity has been restored, y’all, and on top of all that, I bet the governor’s mansion is long overdue for a semi-homemade makeover:

You know, the sort makeover that happens when ponies stop doing musicals and start doing interior decoration.

Now you might be thinking to yourself that this is a terrible idea, but let me tell you, America: NO, IT’S NOT.  You might say tablescapes and cocktail time have no place in quote-unquote “serious politics,” but that’s suggesting we have to restore ALL the sanity.  Can’t we save just one oh-so-delectable slice of batshit crazy and toss the rest of the insanity into the dumpster?  I mean, have you seen what happens when she dresses up for her Halloween episodes, America?  This happens:

(more…)

Here’s Christine Pedi Doing Liza Minnelli and Carol Channing Doing Lady Gaga’s “Telephone”
July 9, 2010

Naturally, it’s fabulous, so of course you should watch it:

I must admit, however, that as I was watching this shimmering, rainbow-scaled ouroboros of unmitigated homosexuality, a series of thoughts did my mind:

  1. This is indubitably one the gayest things I’ve ever seen, but debatably THE gayest thing, so He-Man can take his fabulous secret powers and sit back down.  For now.
  2. The Snickers bar, as we all know, is an excellent touch.
  3. Also, now I’m in the mood for a Snickers.
  4. And a martini.
  5. Oh, and while we’re at it, raspberries as well.
  6. Come to think of it, I should probably hit up the grocery store after work.  Oops, digression!
  7. Anybody in the mood for a round of Movie Critic?
  8. I wonder if the Big Gay Ice Cream Truck’s ice cream come in d*ck flavor, and if so, what would that taste like?  Sausage and Old Spice, perhaps?
  9. But most importantly:

(more…)

Sex and the City BOOOOO!, or: Sometimes You Just Have to Shut Up and Drink the Kool-Aid-tini
April 9, 2010

I’m really glad that I never said I’d eat Charlotte’s spaceship hat if I became excited for Sex and the City 2, because right about now I’d be trolling Paula Deen’s website in hopes of figuring out how to best deep fry that thing.  New (and appealing!) Sex and the City 2 trailer, y’all:

Maybe the stick I’ve had up my ass about this movie has finally given me toxic shock, or perhaps my emotional age is getting to be as old as Samantha’s cooch and thus causing early onset dementia, but Sex and the City 2 doesn’t look half bad.  I mean, it doesn’t look good in the way that the latter, more emotionally nuanced seasons ever were, but I’m willing to make peace with the fact that these movies will never recapture that feel, so I might as well quit my bitching and raise the pink flag to Michael Patrick King.  Seriously, given that Carrie’s plotline is like Casablanca if Casablanca dropped the whole Nazi thing and was set in Abu Dhabi and written by a drag queen, I’m already sorta giddy.  But then there’s this moment that made me go “Whaaat?“:

(more…)

Nothing Tastes as Good as Diva Feels
February 11, 2010

I’m pretty sure this Snickers commercial isn’t quite what Kate Moss meant when she said her life motto was “Nothing tastes as good as skinny feels.”  But I’m also pretty sure that if there’s any truth to this Snickers commercial, Kate Moss is some sort of all-knowing Magic 8 Ball made out of hungry orphans’ tears and the occasional carrot stick:

It should go without saying that I think this ad is brilliant, and I feel like having a Snickers to reward all that cleverness.  That, and my inner-fat girl’s on her heavy-flow day.  But it’s also worth mentioning that if the gist of this ad is that making like Ms. Moss and just saying no to solid food holds the power to magically transform you into Aretha Franklin and/or Liza Minnelli, isn’t this ad actually about the importance of NEVER EATING AGAIN?

Sure, I recognize that–what with my weaknesses for cookies, Bloomin’ Onions, McDonald’s, anything you can deep-fry or smother in gravy or preferably both, as well as most anything found the snack aisle at Duane Reade–I probably can’t even muster up enough hunger pangs to transform me into an excessively bitchy Judy Garland impersonator.  Still, I’d like to believe that with enough will power (there’s is not enough will power in the world, but let’s pretend), I could become so hungry that I’d become the diva equivalent of sending Liza Minnelli and Aretha Franklin through a telepod.  At the same time:

(more…)

The Best Argument for Gay Marriage to Date? I Do Believe So.
October 21, 2009

This sign was spotted at the recent National Equality March in Washington, DC.  Now we all know there are plenty of ways to argue against the conservative rhetoric that opposes gay marriage, and each of these counterarguments has valid points to consider, but I’m pretty certain this particular rebuttal is iron-clad: 

liza minnelli equality march

Oops, I LOL’d my pants.  I’d really like to shake the hand of whoever made this sign because this poster is ingeniously camp.  And totally spot on.

Yes, her birthright may make her royalty to us, and her storied career has affirmed her status as a true icon in her own right, but the gays cannot be blinded by love: LIZA MINNELLI IS NOT ABOVE THE LAW.  Equality is for everybody, not just for the people that are better than the rest of us because they were totally out-of-control amazing in Cabaret.  Get it right, Government!

Oh, and because no post that involves Liza Minnelli is complete without a clip of a her performing, here’s a lil’ something something for your viewing pleasure:

(more…)

It’s Liza With a Z’s Birthday With a B
March 12, 2009

Liza Minnelli turned 63 today, y’all.  Banks should have closed, the mail shouldn’t have been delivered, and we should’ve all been at home watching Cabaret; alas, this did not happen.  Still, now’s as good a time as any to celebrate one of the few living legends we have it today.  Take it away, Liza:

The lady’s still got it.  RECOGNIZE.

%d bloggers like this: