Nobody Puts Baby in a Horner’s Official Response to Lady Gaga’s “Alejandro”
June 8, 2010

Action:

Reaction: Ermm, neat?

Don’t get me wrong: on a purely aesthetic level, “Alejandro” is a slick–if chilly–experience.  Sure, previous videos have been more unabashed efforts in batshit insanity and/or delirious camp (two qualities I’ve long adored in Lady Gaga’s oeuvre), but I suppose some sort of restraint in those arenas is the price of artistic growth, so brava!  I guess?

Added to that, I’m sure there’s a way interpret “Alejandro” as nearly nine minutes of back-up dancers in various states of fascist-themed fetish gear, Lady Gaga in various states of Catholicism-inspired dress/undress, machine gun bras, pageboy haircuts, and overtly gay imagery (you can’t call it homoerotic when it’s anything but subtle, Shot of Push-Ups That Look “Conspicuously” Like Butt Sex) that coalesce into some sort of treatise on Foucauldian power structures and queer revolution; unfortunately for me, I’ve recently been gorging on far too much pop culture garbage to fit into my size-28 pretentious pants and try waaay too hard to convince myself I’m anything other than strangely underwhelmed by “Alejandro.”  It’s entirely serviceable, possibly even genius, but by no means blowing my mind.

And besides:

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