Because It’s So Good When She’s Bad, Here’s a Girl Singing “I Will Always Love You” and Freaking Out
November 4, 2010

Seeing as how I’m a self-acknowledged karaoke nightmare, I wouldn’t want to try and measure up against anybody else’s vocal prowess.  Even if they mute.  And particularly if they were Whitney Houston, circa The Bodyguard:

As such, I’m not going to say that the girl in the video after the jump is bad, per se.  I’ll just leave it at that when she does fail, she fails spectacularly.  And with liberal use of the “f*ck” bomb, so if you happen to be at work, you probably shouldn’t be on this site pinkies out and headphones up, y’all:

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Facebook Recommends Justin Bieber
June 19, 2010

WHAT?!?  Because being Lady Gaga and looking like a lesbian moppet are both homo things?  Ew, Facebook.  No.

(Unless–of course–it’s this, in which case: I LOVE IT.)

AdSense FAIL
June 14, 2010

From that post about Sean Hayes making a ZING! at the Tony Awards comes an important message from our randomly generated sponsors:

Never mind that the Duluth Pack has been guaranteed for life since 1882, y’all.  I need to know how many brown rice and vegetable farts this bag can fit, because I’ve got PLENTY.

Much love to David for point this one out.

Justin Beiber vs. a Revolving Door
May 20, 2010

Just because I’ve nothing against Justin Bieber doesn’t mean I can’t appreciate a good revolving door FAIL:

Seriously, I don’t think I’ve schadenfreuded that hard since this face.

All my love to Videogum for this one.

Important Moments in Lost FAILs: Lost Fails to Deliver Sufficient Levels of Dick Alpert Hotness, Abs
March 24, 2010

As a self-admitted Lost fan facing the rapidly approaching series finale, I try to remind myself that despite all the years of obsessive speculation and moments of howler-monkeying at the television in shock/frustration/amazement, Lost is only a show, and so it is only natural for it to occasionally slip up.  After all, how else do the explain the utterly delicious third season mistake that was Paulo?

Or his partner in crime, Nikki?

Her catchphrase?  Also delicious.  The rest?  Not so much.  Small wonder her character was buried alive, though it’s such a shame Rodrigo Santoro had to go with her.  Double whoops on the sexy front, Lost writers!

Anywhoozle, I fully accept that no show–including Lost–will ever be perfect, and I can make peace with the occasional Lost misstep much like I eventually made peace with the public school storyarc in the third season of The O.C.; HOWEVER, that doesn’t mean I won’t call things like I see ’em, which brings us to this:

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Hardee’s is Lowering America’s Standards in Acceptable Breakfast Items/Clever Innuendoes
June 30, 2009

Two birds, one stone.  Quite impressive, really.  Then again, Hardee’s is nothing if one thing:

hardees classiest

Do you not believe me?  Then just take a gander at their new ad for something they thus far call “biscuit holes”:

CLASSY!  I sincerely hope that these people were actually paid actors (or at least let in on this “clever” marketing “joke” in order to guide their responses); otherwise this is yet another sad day in America’s cultural and intellectual decline.

Don’t get me wrong, I get that it’s been long understood that sex sells.  But since when did we try to market a product off of anal sex jokes?  “The a-hole tastes funny”?  Really?  Yes, I would suspect that it would taste rather funny, but I also don’t think that anybody’s fish taco is tasting magically delicious, so this is just DUMB; unfortunately, it’s so much worse as well.

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