Archive for April, 2015

He Used to Love Doggy Chow, Too
April 11, 2015

craigslist missed connection cat food manners

Cristal: You’ve got great manners. They’re really beautiful.

Nomi: Thanks.

Cristal: I like nice manners. I always have, how about you?

Nomi: I like having nice manners.

Cristal: How you like having ’em?

Nomi: What do you mean?

Cristal: You know what I mean.

Nomi: I like having them with a fork, in a can of cat food.

[hamburgermilk via I Have Seen The Whole Of The Internet]

Advertisements

TGIF! Now Here’s Emily Blunt and Anne Hathaway in a Lip Sync Battle
April 10, 2015

You know, it’s odd to me that two of the stars of The Devil Wears Prada doing a highly produced Lip Sync for Your Life isn’t a thing that has already aired on Logo, but I digress.

Emily Blunt and Anne Hathaway were on Lip Sync Battle last night. Emily Blunt performed Janis Joplin’s “Piece of My Heart”, Anne Hathaway performed Miley Cyrus’s “Wrecking Ball”, and judging by these performances, we don’t have to watch anymore, because this show has already peaked at maximum camp. Seriously, unless they get Nicole Kidman does ping pong trick while lip syncing to Mika’s “Grace Kelly” (it’d be a promotional tie-in to her Lifetime debut), we can stick a fork in this juicy glitterball, ‘cos she’s done. This being a battle, though, my question is: who won?

(more…)

Happy Easter, From a Good Egg
April 5, 2015

bette davis easter egg

And a happy birthday to Bette Davis! We love you!

[original image via Pinterest]

Where Are Rita Ora’s Eyebrows?
April 4, 2015

rita ora no eyebrows

Here’s a picture Rita Ora, whom I’m most familiar with as the ex-girlfriend of a future Taylor Swift song and the francophillic sister in an erotic thriller for third-year law students, did for a photoshoot for Clash Magazine, and it’s really great, if you’re into trichotillomania. Personally, I’ve been studying this picture for the better part of the day, and I’m just as confused as Rita Ora looks in this picture. I mean, really, where are her eyebrows?

(more…)

TGIF! Now Here’s Elizabeth Taylor with an Adorable, Matching Dog
April 3, 2015

elizabeth taylor with matching dog

Well, it’s Friday once again, and judging by the subways in NYC this morning, practically nobody’s going into work, so why not take a well-deserved break with this glamour photo of Elizabeth Taylor with an adorable, matching dog? It has everything I could ask for while on holiday: elegance, sophistication, the lavender backdrop from a Sears Portrait, jewelry, matching wigs, and Elizabeth Taylor. It even has a puppy, because other people love puppies, too, and why not? It’s Friday, and I’m not a monster!

So happy Friday, everybody! Just whatever you do, don’t ask who wore it better. You already know the answer.

[Image via Spoiled Maltese]

Here’s a Glorious Video of Camille Paglia Talking About Susan Sontag
April 2, 2015

camille paglia wgbh susan sontag

Earlier this morning, it was brought to my attention that today is Camille Paglia’s birthday, WHOM I LOVE. At last, I thought, the perfect opportunity to post this WGBH interview with Camille Paglia from the early 1990s! In it, she responds to Susan Sontag’s claim that Sontag had never even heard of Camille Paglia. That is completely insane, according to Camille Paglia, because who hasn’t heard of Camille Paglia, inquired Camille Paglia. My point is: Camille Paglia…and also Susan Sontag! Two favorite intellectual tastes that taste great together!

(more…)

This Krispy Kreme Hot Dog Is Not an April Fools’ Joke, Y’all
April 1, 2015

krispy kreme hot dog I repeat: this Krispy Kreme Hot Dog is not an April Fools’ joke, y’all. It is a cross-promotion between the New Castle Krispy Kreme and the Wilmington Blue Rocks, a minor league baseball team in Wilmington, Delaware. The Krispy Kreme Hot Dog is a hot dog covered in bacon, drizzled with raspberry jam, and served inside a Krispy Kreme doughnut.

It’s “a new chapter in ballpark concessions”, and that chapter is titled “Sweet Jesus.” It’s a reminder that there is no crying in baseball, but there is an ever-present threat of cardiac arrest. It’s a desperate howl from the monster mouth of a national pastime gone awry. The Krispy Kreme Hot Dog is why you’re Shaq fat, America, and it’s why I wish I knew how to quit you: (more…)

%d bloggers like this: