Here’s Saturday Night Live‘s Weekend Update correspondent Stefon telling us about all of New York City’s best summer hot spots:Vodpod videos no longer available.
It’s such a shame my parents won’t be coming up here this summer. After all, nothing says “Thanks for visiting, Mom and Dad!” quite like partying with a bunch of shims and a cat from a bodega, but I digress.
Now here’s Miley Cyrus, who’s once again making a bid for pop star legitimacy by stomping around the stage like she’s the X-Man Angel’s kid sister, you know, the one a fondness for pompadours and dressing up like an extra in a community theater production of The Rocky Horror Show:
In Miley’s defense, you could definitely file this one under “Nightmare of a Crystal Meth Addict,” particularly if the meth addict in question is Talkatoo Cockatoo:
That said, I could probably come up with something more batshit after a bender of turducken gravy and a screening of the Hannah Montana movie. Added to that, this whole “MY BIRD IS A METAPHOR” thing is already feeling rather exhausted, and if I’ve learned anything from repeatedly watching Party Monster, it’s that few things are more boring than a Club Kid who keeps recycling the same outfit. Hell, Miley Cyrus isn’t even old enough to get into Slice, let alone do those dance movies without raising an eyebrow or two!
Seriously, I don’t know if this is just another example of a female pop singer trying too hard or if this performance just needs that certain “It” factor (Black George Washington), but the post-Lady-Gaga pop landscape demands crazy, and this performance of “I Can’t Be Tamed” isn’t even crazy enough to keep me up in a club full of screaming babies in Mozart wigs, y’all, so until Miley Cyrus is parading around the stage in a Birdo costume, color me BORED.