Glorious News! Rena Riffel’s Showgirl Will Be the Showgirls Sequel/Remake/Somethingorother of Our Penny/Hopes and Dreams

Showgirls: The Return may purport to be the sequel to the greatest movie of all time (because it adds “The Return” to the end of the title), but if the extended trailer’s any indication, that doesn’t mean I have to treat this half-cooked sauerbraten like its canon:

What have you done, Marc Vorlander?  Sure, I haven’t seen this many boobs-per-minute since the last time I watched Showgirls (January 16, 2010, but who’s counting?), which I guess counts as a step in the right direction, but everything else about this trailer is a turgid art-house hot mess.  A Showgirls sequel shouldn’t look boring, but this looks BORING.  Even worse, I don’t see any Rena Riffel, and we were promised Rena Riffel!  Seriously, universe, is there no Penny/hope for a Showgirls follow-up that lives up to the original?

Oh wait, there is:


YESSS!  Rena Riffel, beloved Showgirls cult actress and–more importantly–writer/director/star of Trasharella, has her own sequel in the works.  Getting a Showgirls sequel about Penny/Hope being made by the actress that played Penny/Hope is obviously a good thing, but getting a Showgirls sequel from the artist responsible for the batshit crazy schlock camp masterpiece that is Trasharella?  Perfection.  Really, if you don’t know what-in-the-Barbie-crucifixes-and-magic-lipstick I’m talking about, start making better life choices by checking out the trailer right this very moment.  And when you’re done with that, watch the first teaser for Rena’s latest trashterpiece, Showgirl:

I’m sorry, but BRILLIANT.  I get that this teaser trailer may look like nothing but bad acting, terrible dialogue, and all the art-direction a $50 bill and a McDonald’s coupon book can buy, but that’s missing the point entirely.  If Showgirl is anything like Trasharella (and–let’s go there–it looks even better), it’s going to be a do-it-yourself low-budget, intentionally camp bender of crazy pills and awesome sauce. This is filmmaking without the pretenses of being anything other than cheap and trashy and over the top, and that’s precisely what makes it so damn ingenious.   

As of yet, neither Rena Riffel’s blog nor the official Showgirl website have any word of a release date, but I’m willing to be patient if I know the end result will have bitch slaps and bitter drag queens and epic bon mots like “Whore, now come do my nails.”  Seriously, it’s just like that old saying goes: if you want your Showgirls sequel done right, do it yourself, but only if your name is Rena Riffel.

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5 Responses

  1. What. The. Fuck.

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  2. […] since that one time when the nerds saw Star Wars Episode I: The Phantom Menace or that other time when I saw the trailer for Marc Vorlander’s Showgirls: The Return, but something tells me that’s doubtful, and that something is […]

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  3. A teaser for a non-existing film and folded rags as locations. Bam! What a crap. And Rena Riffel looks old. At least Vorlander got hot chicks in his film. One star for Michael Anderson although.

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    • If you think a bunch of “hot chicks” is what makes for a good Showgirls sequel, then I must politely disagree on account of personal taste. My love of Showgirls comes from a love of high camp, and Marc Vorlander’s sequel looks anything but camp, which is why I’m far more excited for Ms. Riffel’s project. She already has Trasharella under her directorial belt, and while I’m sure it was made for a fraction of the budget for Vorlander’s Showgirls sequel, it has a deliriously campy vibe that is also present in the Showgirl, so I for one hope her movie gets made.

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