If the Music Video for Adam Lambert’s “Time for Miracles” Is Any Indication, 2012 Will Be a Time for Train Wrecks

Oh dear.  There’s a music video for Adam Lambert’s single off the 2012 soundtrack, “Time for Miracles,” and it is as fabulous and ridiculous as this image I found through Google image search for “2012 soundtrack”:

adam lambert 2012

So, you know, very fabulous.  And extremely ridiculous.

As with everything else coming down the 2012 pipeline, it’s a batshit crazy train wreck of histrionic performances and apocalyptic disaster.  And, as with everything else coming down the 2012 pipeline, I mean that as a compliment:

Don’t ask me what the hell this ballad has to do with a movie about the complete and total end of the world as depicted by John Cusack and company being chased in various methods of transportation by massive waves of all-consuming destruction.  I couldn’t tell you.  What I can tell you is that the only thing that keeps this video from total perfection is its lack of Space Arks and Oliver Platt.  Fortunately we still have Adam Lambert and his glorious flamboyance, and that’s almost as good.

Sure, his outfit may be more goth-lite than tranny fierce, but damn does he get into his sad faces.  At several points it looks as though he’s passing the mother of all kidney stones.  Your urethra hurts for him, and if that’s not a sign of a gifted performer, I don’t know what is.

Added to that, I get a kick out of how this video’s shoe-string budget vision of a post-apocalyptic Los Angeles largely consists of people running about while small explosions erupt from cars.  And, seeing as post-apocalypses frequently lead to rioting, they occasionally run in front of Adam Lambert and push each other.  Oh, and in the apocalypse, there will be a parked school bus next to a burning cop car.  And what about when the apocalypse calms itself down, and the sun comes out, and the world decides it’s not going to end after all?  We will skateboard in celebration.

This is the way the world ends, y’all.  Not with a bang, but with a limited budget and an overly ambitious artistic vision.

Snaps to Dose.ca for the brilliant Adam Lambert/Independence Day mash-up pic.

7 Responses

  1. okay, I specificly enjoyed the following artistic directions: how the pizzacato from the string section was in sync with the fireballs, the crappy lawn chair that seemed to spontanously combust (why? I think there would be a lot more to worry about when Hell’s army reers it’s ugly head then melting lawn furniture), and when the end was over how everyone came out of a giant parking garage to survey the damage, skateboard and listen to Lambert inform us that it’s okay, now.
    And I know we are in a economic crisis, and even Hollywood is trying to save, but for the love of God couldn’t they have got a better LA backdrop? I’m no Lucus, but it’s called Green Screens people.
    Other then that I liked the song…Lambert is the gay brother I always wanted. He wears your makeup, sings at all octives at cocktail parties, and he was on BROADWAY!! What hag wouldn’t love him? godbless ’em.


  2. Dear Alisha – great post – but Lambert was NEVER on Broadway.


  3. I wouldn’t mind him being my GBF — gay best friend — because every girl needs one. shopping trips, mani-pedis, dancing and parties when you don’t have a boyfriend.

    But I don’t understand the female lust for him.

    The CGI on the video is cheesy. One can only hope that the movie’s CGI is better.


  4. Who’s looking at the CGI’s?


  5. he wasn’t on Broadway? did i make that up? thank you for the correction. i’m going to lash myself now. I’ve been telling everyone that he was on Broadway since his first round on idol. that my friends is how you show one’s ass.


  6. […] people this week.  ABC has yet again pulled the plug on my favorite Cristal-Connors-channeling, wasteland-wandering glam […]


  7. […] banshee when I saw the White Queen’s ultra-fabulous crown (seriously, so fabulous!), or–given my unabashed love for Adam Lambert’s “Time for Miracles”–I could just admit I’ve got a bonafide weakness for anthemic ballads intended for movie […]


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