So this is still most definitely happening:
And, yes, I may have in the past been a little harsh when it comes to the remake of A Nightmare on Elm Street. Okay, I’ve definitely been really harsh. But whatever. I can’t help myself. I’m inclined to be protective of the horror films that I hold dear. That, and I have a tendency to become hyperbolically bitchy when it comes to defending said films from the clutches of Hollywood remakery. These things happen.
Anywhosie, the first official trailer for the remake has splattered itself all over the interwebs (get it? It’s a horror pun. ‘Cos this blog is the face of sophisticated, erudite humor. Le duh.), so let’s all watch and reassess the situation based upon the latest evidence. After all, that’s how scientists and the cast of CSI: Miami do things in the real world:
Ugh, was I wrong? Dammit! I hate being wrong, but I think I was wrong!
Even if it does look a bit aesthetically generic (I’m beginning to suspect that deep blues and sickly greens and sepia yellows are requisite of Michael-Bay-produced horror remakes), I’m warming up to this quicker than a pan of Jiffy Pop. Sure, the trailer’s mostly quick cuts and slow motion and lots of loud screaming (because the loudness and frequency of the screams is directly related to how scary the movie will actually be; that’s lesson one in Intro to Trailer Math) and scenes that are straight out of the orginal, but I can get behind this. Why? Because Jackie Earle Haley is freaking me out.
Seriously, he looks to be a worthy successor to Robert Englund (or as worthy as there’ll ever be). The face looks suitably grotesque, and that voice? Creepy. Like murderous pedophile mega creepy. Well played, Jackie Earle Haley. You’ve just earned a second spot in my pantheon of nightmares (the first was for that scene in the car in Little Children).
So yeah, I’m gonna turn that backlash frown upside down and keep the bitchiness to myself. Past precedent suggests that my enthusiasm will eventually sour, but for now I’m happy to have the honeymoon phase.