Happy Birthday, Paula Deen! January 19, 2010

It’s no secret over here at Nobody Puts Baby in a Horner that I love me some Paula Deen like Paula Deen loves herself some butter.  And while my holiday plans to visit my deep-fried mecca (The Lady and Sons) were ultimately foiled (curses to you, unnecessarily convoluted and ambiguous process by which one ensures a table at the Lady and Sons!), she remains the Julia to my Julie.  Sure, I may not be blogging about my experience cooking Paula Deen’s recipe oeuvre (I lack the requisite ambition/willingness to have a coronary before I’m 30), but I will gladly blog about this:

Sure, it may not be playing an instrumental role in bringing French cuisine into the American household, but Paula Deen once had really hot guys in tight shirts deliver her a giant bust made ENTIRELY OUT OF BUTTER.  AND THEN SHE KISSED IT.  Et tu, Mrs. Child?

Also, only Paula Deen is capable of the following culinary crazy train:

MonaVie Releases New Crack Drink! August 17, 2009

Greetings from Shmarker!  It’s been awhile, fellow followers of all feats fagulous, since my last post.  I’m sorry for such a long delay (though I know I don’t have quite the following my fellow NPBiaH posters have), but I must blame my studies for such.  No, seriously. I had to sprint a session of marathon reading in order to finish Gravity’s Rainbow by my self-imposed deadline for my directed reading, followed by a fantastic trip to Washington, DC, where I took pictures in front of rockets (see, that was educational as well!) when not drinking at Brickskeller, house of 1,000 beers, followed by a brief visit with Mrs. Dalloway, who insisted on buying the flowers herself (that’s what servants are for!), then a pit stop for Three Cups of Tea with Greg Mortensen (a somewhat delightful read, but I’ll let you know more after I attend a speech he is giving my school and place of employment on Sunday), only to begin my whale watching expedition to locate Moby Dick.  So, yes, I’m a tad stressed.

And, apparently, the Diet Coke of nerd, as Shmathan so nicely called me in a comment on my last post.

But anyway, in an attempt to procrastinate on my reading, I felt compelled to tell you about the most amazing product out there: MonaVie’s energy drink.

Isn’t that gorgeous looking?  And, if you look closely enough, it’s HEALTHY, too!  I mean, 170 calories in 8.4 ounces!  But, it’s made of Brazilian super fruits, and every Brazilian I’ve seen is super skinny, so it must be healthy!  Delicious, too.  It tastes like a drink my bar makes, which uses regular MonaVie and is marketed as “the world’s healthiest cocktail.”  I like to fashion myself as a connoisseur of energy drinks, as I usually consume at least three or free sugar free Red Bulls, Monsters, Rockstars, or Venoms a week.  A neighbor who sells the stuff brought these MonaVies to me.  It has replaced all other energy drinks as my favorite.  It is Just. Plain. Amazing.  As I live only a two-minute walk away from a movie theatre, I drank one before seeing Julie and Julia last night, and this is where my diatribe about the wonders of this drink really kicks off.